Age guide: 6–18 years, with age-appropriate participation
A screen agreement does not need ten pages, dramatic signatures or a rule for every possible app. It needs a few expectations your family understands, can follow and knows how to revisit.
The short answer
- Agree what the plan is trying to protect, such as sleep, shared meals or focused schoolwork.
- Cover content, contact, privacy and purchases as well as time.
- Include adults and make asking for help safe.
- Choose a review date so the agreement can grow with your family.
The American Academy of Pediatrics offers a customisable Family Media Plan. eSafety also provides family tech agreement resources. The wording below is an original starting point for discussion, not a replacement for a child’s individual support needs or a platform’s account rules.
1. Start with what matters, not what annoys you
Ask each person: “What do we want more room for?” Answers might include sleep, games together, homework without interruptions or keeping in touch with grandparents. This gives the rules a purpose everyone can see.
Choose two or three priorities. An agreement built around every recent disagreement can feel like a punishment list.
2. Make time and place specific
- “During the evening meal, we put personal entertainment away.”
- “Before gaming starts, we agree on the stopping point.”
- “At night, we charge leisure devices in the agreed place.”
Adapt for work, medical or accessibility needs rather than treating every exception as hypocrisy. Explain exceptions clearly, including when an adult is waiting for an important call.
3. Add the boundaries a timer cannot cover
- New apps and purchases: who checks them and who pays?
- Online contact: what can be shared and how do we handle unfamiliar people?
- Photos: whose permission do we ask before posting?
- Schoolwork: which kinds of help are allowed, including AI?
For a younger child, use a few concrete examples. With teenagers, discuss more autonomy alongside clearly understood responsibilities and local rules.
4. Write a help-seeking promise
Try: “If something online worries, embarrasses or frightens you, come to us. We will listen first and help work out what to do.” Avoid promising that there will never be any restriction, because a safety problem may require action.
Tell your child which other trusted adult they can approach if you are unavailable. A plan that only works when one parent is present is difficult to use.
5. Agree how to repair a broken agreement
Describe a proportionate response in advance. If a new game was started too late, the next session may need a different starting time or closer support. Avoid humiliating consequences, public shaming or punishments unrelated to the issue.
Adults can model repair too: “I kept checking my phone at dinner. Tomorrow I’ll leave it on the shelf.”
A simple one-page structure
- What we want to protect.
- Our three everyday expectations.
- What needs adult agreement.
- How we ask for help.
- When we will review the plan.
Try it for a week and ask what needs adjusting. The aim is a workable family rhythm, not a perfect contract that nobody can remember.
Keep exploring
- Too much screen time? Look at your child’s day before counting every minute
- Parental controls without the panic: your first setup checklist
