Age guide: Families setting up age-appropriate connected devices
A new device arrives with a long list of settings and very little explanation about which ones matter for your child. Start with a few clear questions: who can contact them, what can they access, what can they buy and what information might they share?
The short answer
- Use the correct child or teen account arrangements for the device, service and country.
- Review content, contact, purchases, privacy and time settings.
- Explain the supervision rather than making hidden monitoring your default.
- Use controls alongside conversation; they are not a guarantee of safety.
eSafety describes parental controls as useful tools with limitations. Its guidance also stresses age, experience and open discussion. The checklist below helps organise setup; exact features depend on the device, account, app and current software.
1. Start with the account, not the timer
Check which account your child actually uses on the phone, tablet, computer, television and console. A carefully restricted profile is less useful if the same device opens freely into an adult account.
- Follow the service’s age and consent requirements.
- Use a secure parent password that is not reused elsewhere.
- Understand account recovery before you need it.
- Keep security and system updates current.
2. Check content and communication separately
A content filter and a messaging restriction do different jobs. Review what your child can watch, download or search for, then check who can contact them through chat, games, friend requests or live features.
Ask your child to show you the apps they use with friends. A game may also be a place to send messages, share images or meet unfamiliar people.
3. Close the surprise-spending gap
- Review app installation and purchase approval options.
- Check subscriptions and in-game purchases separately.
- Remove payment methods that do not need to be available.
- Explain that a free download may still contain paid features.
Choose rules your child can understand: “Ask before buying or signing up,” rather than assuming they recognise every payment screen or trial offer.
4. Review privacy and permissions
Check account visibility, location sharing and app access to the camera, microphone, contacts and photos. Allow what is needed for the agreed purpose, rather than approving everything automatically.
Discuss the privacy of other people too. A child should not upload a friend’s image or private information simply because an app makes it easy.
5. Add a stopping routine and a help plan
Use the time controls that fit your family agreement, and check what happens when time runs out. Explain how an exception is requested. Make sure your child can still reach appropriate help when they need it.
Try saying: “These settings are here to support you while you learn. If something gets through or feels wrong, tell me. We will work out the next step together.”
When should we review the settings?
After a new device, a new app, a major update or a change in your child’s needs. As children grow, discuss how supervision and autonomy should change. The aim is to build judgement and trust, not to make someone permanently dependent on adult permission for every action.
SuperMOMs and superDADs do not need a perfect dashboard. A setup you understand, a child who knows the boundaries and a dependable conversation are useful places to begin.
Keep exploring
- A safer YouTube starting point: what parents can check before pressing play
- The first smartphone: a readiness conversation, not a birthday deadline
