At lunch your toddler points to the water and says “milk.” Yesterday they used the same word for milk. Now you have two things to figure out. Which drink do they want, and what have they understood about the word?
You can respond to the first question right away. Look where your child is pointing and say, “Water? Here’s your water.” If their choice is clear, give them the drink. They can hear the word and use it later. They’ve already found a way to make a request today.
One word can cover a lot of ground
Language researchers call it overextension when a child uses a word for a wider set of things than adults usually do. A toddler might use “milk” for several drinks or “bus” for other large vehicles. The familiar word may be the one they can reach for when they see something similar or when the situation feels familiar.
What a child says and what they understand can differ. In a study of early words such as “dog” and “apple,” younger children made more mistakes when naming things than when showing what they understood. The researchers also found errors in understanding, so the difference isn’t something you can assume for an individual child. You might see your child say “milk” while pointing to water and later bring the water when you ask for it. Both moments can tell you something about how they use and understand words.
What to say depends on what they’re doing
- They’re asking for something and you can tell what it is. Acknowledge the request and name the thing as you hand it over. “You want water. Here you go.” They hear the word while they’re getting the drink. You can carry on without asking them to repeat it.
- They’re asking and you’re unsure. If both options are available and suitable for your child, show them and name each one. “Water or milk?” Give them time to look, point, sign or answer with their usual communication aid. If their choice is still unclear, make a tentative guess and give them a chance to change it.
- They’re showing you something. Join in with a comment. If they call a delivery van a bus, try “A van! It’s bringing a parcel.” When they’re ready for a longer exchange, you might add, “The bus carries people. This van carries boxes.” One detail is plenty when they’re already looking for the next thing.
Let the same word show up in more than one place
A child might first hear “water” at lunch in a particular cup. Use the word when filling a bottle on the way out, pouring it into another cup or reading about a character who has a drink. Keep the link clear by talking about the thing your child can see, touch or recognise. “Water in your bottle” works on a busy morning. With a preschooler who’s interested, try “This is a different cup, but it’s still water.”
Try the reverse, too. If the same cup holds different drinks at different times, name what’s in it as you pour. Your child might be using the word for the drink, the cup or the whole routine. Hearing “cup” and “water” in the same moment gives them a chance to connect each word to what it names.
If your child uses pictures, signs or a device, respond to the message the way you would respond to speech. You can model a familiar sign or symbol while you name the drink, and wait long enough for your child to make a choice in their own way. In multilingual households, use the words that feel natural to the people doing the talking. Different caregivers can name the same thing in different languages. See how to support language in a multilingual family.
Look at the rest of the conversation
There’s more to notice than which word comes out. Does your child find familiar things you name during routines? Are they finding new ways to tell you what they want or to show you something interesting? A few ordinary examples are more useful in a conversation with a clinician than a score from a quiz at home.
Talk to your child’s healthcare professional if they often seem unable to understand familiar words, have persistent difficulty communicating everyday needs, or you have concerns about hearing. Get prompt advice if your child loses words, gestures or other skills they previously used. You can ask whether a hearing check or a speech and language assessment is appropriate. This guide to what to notice when you’re worried about late talking can help you prepare for that conversation.
