A developmental assessment is meant to show how a child communicates, plays, moves, learns and manages everyday demands. Preparation should make the experience more predictable—not teach a child how to “pass.” The most helpful message is simple: you are going somewhere new, adults will talk and play with you, and there are no perfect answers.
Explain only what you know
Ask the service what the visit may include, who will be there, how long it usually lasts and whether there will be breaks. Then give your child a truthful explanation at their level.
- Toddler or preschooler: “We’re going to a new room. You can play. I’ll be close.”
- Primary-school child: “We’re meeting people who want to learn what feels easy and what feels hard for you. You might talk, look at pictures or do activities.”
- Older child: “This is to understand how you learn and experience things so adults can support you better. You can say when you do not understand or need a break.”
Avoid promises you cannot guarantee, such as “there will be no hard questions.” Instead say, “If something feels hard, we can tell them.”
Make a short visual plan
Use three to five pictures or simple drawings: travel, arrive, activities, break, home. Show the sequence once or twice rather than repeatedly rehearsing it. If the service provides photos or a social story, look through it together. A child who uses augmentative communication should have their usual device or communication board available and charged.
Pack for regulation, not performance
Bring glasses, hearing equipment, medication normally needed during the visit, a drink or familiar snack if permitted, and one or two comfort or sensory items. Add spare clothes if relevant. Tell the team in advance about access needs, allergies, mobility requirements, toileting support, language or interpreter needs, and anything that makes waiting rooms difficult.
Good sleep and food can help, but real life happens. Do not cancel solely because your child had an imperfect morning without first checking with the service. Tiredness, anxiety and recovery after effort can also be relevant information.
What not to rehearse
Do not drill eye contact, teach stock answers or repeatedly test the tasks you think may appear. This can increase stress and make it harder for clinicians to understand the child’s natural strategies. You can practise self-advocacy instead: “I need a break,” “Please say it another way,” or pointing to a break card.
Prepare your own notes separately. Include strengths, concerns, examples across settings, relevant history and questions. The child development appointment checklist can help. If you are unsure what type of visit has been booked, screening and full assessment are different steps.
On the day
Arrive with enough time to find the room, but not so early that waiting becomes the hardest part. Let the assessor see the child’s usual communication and movement. You can clarify instructions, but pause before answering for the child. Ask for a break if distress is rising. A respectful team should be interested in comfort and access, not compliance.
Afterward, offer a familiar decompression activity and keep questions light. Some children want to talk; others need quiet. Do not ask whether they “did well.” Try: “You handled a new experience. What would help you recover now?”
If your child cannot take part in the expected way
That is information, not failure. Tell the team what participation looks like at home or school and ask whether another observation, teacher information, a different setting or adapted tasks would give a fairer picture. Assessment is a process of understanding, not a single performance.
